this quarter/year is off to a really interesting start.
1) i feel as if the most prominent responsibility characteristic of adulthood for me is to understand my emotions -- to reign them in, to live with them, to give them necessary space, to own them, to befriend them. i am reminded of a quotation by joshua harris that says, "if we want to feel deeply, we must think deeply... true emotion- emotion that is reliable and does not lead us astray- is always a response to reality, to truth."
2) something about foreign words/concepts is very attractive lol, two of my favorite words right now are conscientização (friere) & cariño (duncan-andrade).
3) today self care involves feeding myself pesto pasta with sauteed asparagus & sweet peas + roasted tomatoes & mushrooms, drinking citrus sparkling water, going rock climbing, going running, blogging, and updating my ipod.
4) pain is an interesting thing... it "becomes a strange friend...but even in hours spent examining it and learning from it and even befriending it, it is ultimately from an external source and until that source relinquishes its power, the pain remains." -dr. charlene jin from isaac's 6th symposium
5) commonsensical practices/habits that i learn in a romantic relationship are for some reason not so commonsensical in my platonic friendships and i wonder why that is. i want to develop a more substantive understanding of platonic relationships and how they in fact may be the greatest of all loves... but even as i do so, how do i reconcile this heart-changing information with the isolating potential of implementing it in friendships where we are no longer on the same page? this is a rhetorical question. i realize that the goal is not to be right but to understand and submit and meet in the middle to move on.
6) everything that i assumed i knew about committing to a fellowship is being shaken as i find myself in a reality in which i desire to withdraw for my well-being. and even in saying this i feel myself subject to the condemnatory judgment of my brothers and sisters...
7) i need to be conscious of my expectations of others and keep them in check. unfortunately i don't generally become aware of my expectations until they are violated/unmet.
8) i really freaking need to say no to things. because i'm hecka dumb and say yes to commitments and then regret it.
sidenotes;
nrk
1) i feel as if the most prominent responsibility characteristic of adulthood for me is to understand my emotions -- to reign them in, to live with them, to give them necessary space, to own them, to befriend them. i am reminded of a quotation by joshua harris that says, "if we want to feel deeply, we must think deeply... true emotion- emotion that is reliable and does not lead us astray- is always a response to reality, to truth."
2) something about foreign words/concepts is very attractive lol, two of my favorite words right now are conscientização (friere) & cariño (duncan-andrade).
3) today self care involves feeding myself pesto pasta with sauteed asparagus & sweet peas + roasted tomatoes & mushrooms, drinking citrus sparkling water, going rock climbing, going running, blogging, and updating my ipod.
4) pain is an interesting thing... it "becomes a strange friend...but even in hours spent examining it and learning from it and even befriending it, it is ultimately from an external source and until that source relinquishes its power, the pain remains." -dr. charlene jin from isaac's 6th symposium
5) commonsensical practices/habits that i learn in a romantic relationship are for some reason not so commonsensical in my platonic friendships and i wonder why that is. i want to develop a more substantive understanding of platonic relationships and how they in fact may be the greatest of all loves... but even as i do so, how do i reconcile this heart-changing information with the isolating potential of implementing it in friendships where we are no longer on the same page? this is a rhetorical question. i realize that the goal is not to be right but to understand and submit and meet in the middle to move on.
6) everything that i assumed i knew about committing to a fellowship is being shaken as i find myself in a reality in which i desire to withdraw for my well-being. and even in saying this i feel myself subject to the condemnatory judgment of my brothers and sisters...
7) i need to be conscious of my expectations of others and keep them in check. unfortunately i don't generally become aware of my expectations until they are violated/unmet.
8) i really freaking need to say no to things. because i'm hecka dumb and say yes to commitments and then regret it.
sidenotes;
nrk