-october been really rough. all of week 9, can barely get through the day without crying
-i hate planning day by day. i hate not knowing what i'm going to teach.
-i hate when students treat me disrespectfully. darlene reminded me that it's because they are acting out of their non-thinking brains. they are reacting from their trauma. that in a way, because i have created a safe environment, they know they can act like that.
-to that, i say that it fucking sucks
-i wonder if i could choose another career and be happy and not stressed
-is sacrificing my wellbeing to meet my stupid high expectations and moral obligations worth it? idk
-this month was so hard; when i look back i hope i remember how hard it is so that i don't ever dismiss someone else's teaching struggle. also so that i remember where i started at
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