i had a wonderful dream that daddy was hugging me tightly and i was safe and warm and content
this week i barely read the bible. i might have gone through one chapter in 2 kings. but i also find that this week, in the midst of my sleep deprivation and my stress eating, i was intimately aware of His presence and His patient, father-like love for me. this week was a blessed, first-hand experience that my relationship with Him is not so much about being able to spew a sermon off the top of my head about some hotly debated theological issue, but about a sweet, simple, quiet intimacy -- a lens through which i am able to see myself, see other people, see situations, and see God as He sees all. because of this intimacy, i can call out to Him with the simple cries of a child interspersed throughout the day: "help me" -- knowing that He hears and is not pretentiously turning His nose at me with disapproval.
this week i barely read the bible. i might have gone through one chapter in 2 kings. but i also find that this week, in the midst of my sleep deprivation and my stress eating, i was intimately aware of His presence and His patient, father-like love for me. this week was a blessed, first-hand experience that my relationship with Him is not so much about being able to spew a sermon off the top of my head about some hotly debated theological issue, but about a sweet, simple, quiet intimacy -- a lens through which i am able to see myself, see other people, see situations, and see God as He sees all. because of this intimacy, i can call out to Him with the simple cries of a child interspersed throughout the day: "help me" -- knowing that He hears and is not pretentiously turning His nose at me with disapproval.
ponder; i find it slightly off when people tell me, "i pray from this time to this time, and i read bible everyday" or "i didn't read today" or "i didn't pray today" [therefore God must not be pleased with me] ... do you know God's heart towards you? that His heart towards you doesn't depend on what you do -- rather, reading bible/praying/going through the disciplines of the faith are vehicles through which you see God's consistent heart -- not marks that determine your status before Him?
i am blessed in this moment of quiet intimacy & sweet awareness of His presence. i know i am not always going to feel this way.
sidenotes;
going home for the afternoon today :) going to smother my siblings in hugs and go running and drive my car and make dinner for mommy
sidenotes;
going home for the afternoon today :) going to smother my siblings in hugs and go running and drive my car and make dinner for mommy
